


Found yet lost

by Fake_Brit



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Post 2x03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 08:42:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2615468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fake_Brit/pseuds/Fake_Brit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i> (Finn’s always been good at observing, which is why he knows he has found her and lost her in the blink of an eye.) </i><br/>Bellarke from Finn's point of view</p>
            </blockquote>





	Found yet lost

**Author's Note:**

> Not very Finn friendly. Sorry. I dislike the guy and the whole killing out of luv for Clarke looks like a giant what the hell to me.

Finn’s always been extremely good at observing. Things, people, places – everything.

That’s how he noticed that his mother had picked up drinking habits. ( _Empty bottles scattered like chaos in the wake of a storm around the kitchen, her empty glances, her sudden rage)_

That’s how he noticed it was sort of peculiar in Mecha. 

That’s how, when he was eleven, he bumped into a thinned, starved, scared Raven Reyes.

He thought – and maybe, no, surely, he wasn’t the only one – it was the love grown-ups always blabbed mysteriously about, as if letting them know about it clearly would get them floated right away.

They’d steal glances at each other as soon as they could, during these first days, and then smile. (And Raven would blush furiously after that, once she thought he’d rounded the corner, provoking wild giggles in the casual watchers – most often than not, people that they both knew)

As they grew up, they stopped smiling as soon they saw each other and kissing took room in the picture – hands around each other’s necks, their hearts beating so fast that it vibrated through their bodies. (Finn knows because Raven told him while she was drunk once. And he nodded convincingly. He wasn’t drunk, though. Just plain romantic.)

Years went by like that: days that added up to each other, spent waiting to have time to cuddle on his old-as-the-Ark-itself couch and laugh at each other’s silly jokes and holding each other as they shared facts about their day.

They had gone past the kissing, though it was awkward as hell to think about how clumsy and weird he’d felt. (He’d been fidgeting until she showed up, smiling lightly.)

He thought this life was gonna be the best – and most wonderful – he could have.

But, as always there was a nasty little but,there was a part of him that craved freedom. ( _Deeply. Madly. Desperately.)_ So, one day he took off in space – freaking space, she’d shrieked, once she’d been told – and walked. The Ark wasn’t everything out there. _And he wanted more._

_ (So much more) _

_ -:- _

He got caught, in the end.

He got caught, locked up and sent to Earth.

At the thought something that had been sleeping within him woke up and hummed excitedly.

( _He was gonna get more)_

-:-

He arrives on Earth and Clarke catches his eyes immediately.

She’s strong, independent, bright. _Just like a Princess,_ he thinks. And then he grimaces. _Bellamy._

He is unbelievable. Reckless, his mind whispers. _Dangerous._ Finn can’t trust him with keeping them all alive.

( _He won’t because the guy behaves like a damn psycho)_

He watches as Clarke stands up to him, – his life, hers, everyone’s on the line – “From now on, we make the rules,” her voice doesn’t waver one little bit as she stares at him, eyes shining in the fire, her glare fixed on his doubtful – spiteful, even – glance.

He watches as the unusual duo just stands there, air sort of thickening around them, calling it a truce.

(The word they use – Clarke uses, a voice chants obsessively in his head – isn’t truce, though. _It’s co-leadership_.And, as he swallows roughly, he thinks, this is not going to end well.)

-:-

It gets lonely. It gets scary. _It gets plain fucked up._

Wells dies and Clarke seems to become smaller and bigger and broader and thinner at the same time.

Finn begins to turn and toss at night. _He is not gonna see Raven again. She’s the past now._

They’re in the bunker and he can’t help but notice the way her hair curls up lightly on her shoulders,the way she carries herself despite the horror she’s been witnessing lately, the way she faces danger, _the way she is._

They’re undressing and it feels like getting rid of the heaviness the ground has brought upon them. It all happens pretty fast: one minute their clothes are coming off oneby one and the next they are skin to skin. Something roars within him and his body shakes. Her eyes are so bright he can hardly look at her.

He kisses her and it feels like the first real breath he takes after landing on Earth.

Her hands wander on his body and… And Finn stops thinking.

There’s nothing more than them.

(Raven’s figure stops burning through his mind and he’s glad. _So damn glad it’s shameful)_

-:-

He feels like this could be his life now. 

He’s on the ground, Clarke is at his side. Nothing could go wrong. Nothing will, he thinks. They’re gonna be fine. They are gonna make it.

( _And then Raven comes down and it all goes to the deepest pit of hell_ )

-:-

Clarke is avoiding him. She has been avoiding him ever since Raven came down and kissed him right in front of her. He feels like he’s being torn into tiny, bleeding little pieces.

_ (She did save his life, though.) _

He feels like he is going crazy.

She leaves camp with Bellamy. _Bellamy, of all people._

She leaves, and hell breaks loose.

She leaves, and Raven’s anger threatens to grow arms and choke him.

She leaves, and the he wishes the ground he’d wished so much for had swallowed him.

-:-

She – they, a voice reminds him. She had gone off with quite some company earlier – comes back with guns. Lots of guns and bullets and her stance looks much more relaxed.

She catches him staring on her way in and the look she gives him is coldness. Ice, even.

Bellamy utters, “You did good today, Princess,” Finn’s blood boils. That’s his nickname. _Eat up some fantasy and give her another, Blake._

“Good?” She repeats, eyes wide, her voice an octave higher. Typical Bellamy-induced behavior. “I saved your sorry ass, you ungrateful –”

“I see you and my ass have quite a thing going on, huh, Princess?” The boy mutters, eyes gleaming with mischief.

Clarke’s face reddens. “Shut up, you- you prick,” she hisses.

At that, Bellamy smirks and sprints away, calling out cheerfully: “See ya later, Clarke,”

When Finn catches up to her – finally. It feels like he doesn’t have to carry any weight now – she’s still tracing the shape of one of the guns they came back with.

She doesn’t look at him and runs straight to her tent.

-:-

 

They are alone now and she admits what he never dared think of.

“I trust him,” she yells at him with such force he feels like she’s slapped him and left a red mark.

“You can’t be serious,” he says, and his voice is so low he fears his vocal chords might snap. It can’t be. It. Can’t

“I am,” her voice doesn’t waver like that night on the cliff.

Clarke leaves and Finn is left standing there, disbelief still coloring his face.

-:-

He tells her he loves her and she shakes her head at him, the sings of the torture shining like scars

Neither of them knows, but hell will break loose in very little time.

(And now it is real hell)

-:-

They get separated and it changes him. Darkness envelopes him and he becomes a bomb when he spots her father’s watch.

“She’d never give that up without a fight,” Bellamy says and his eyes get clouded. He knows, that is why he did what he did.

(He can’t even say it. Unbelievable)

Raven says, glancing at Bellamy, “You miss mum, we got it. But she’d want you to look, you know?”

Bellamy’s smile is sad and brief, but he nods, muttering, “You bet I will, kiddo,”

Finn bites his lip to keep his annoyance hidden.

He falls asleep thinking about her.

He wants to find her.

(And he swears he will, no matter the cost)

 

-:-

And he does.

She clutches his shirt so hard it’s a wonder it doesn’t tear up.

“You’re alive,” she whispers, her words eating one another. “You’re alive, you’re alive you’re ali –”she stops, abruptly.

The weight of her head on his chest is a comfort he’s dreamt of for days, weeks even.

He is still hugging her body – so thinned, so pale – to his when a deep voice says, “Hey there, Princess,” Clarke leaps away from his grip, leaving his arms outstretched in the air.

She runs to Bellamy, who catches her as soon as she’s close enough. She doesn’t say anything. She just stares at him for what feels so damn close to eternity. And then, out of the blue, she cries her soul out on the curve of his neck.

He is still soothing her, his hands running on her back, voice mumbling, “ _It’s okay, Princess. I’m here. It’s okay, let it out, Clarke, let it all out,”_ when he looks away.

( _Finn’s always been good at observing, which is why he knows he has found her and lost her in the blink of an eye.)_

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hearing your your thoughts would be fantastic ;)


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